1st Nephi Chapter 4

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 Chapter 4


Nephi sneaks back into the city because you know a very recognizable buff dude with rich clothing is so hard to notice


He finds Laban and the dude is piss drunk and passed out on the streets. Like the dude is like a lord with servants but he’s the town drunk for some reason.


Nephi does the rational thing and just takes out the dude’s high quality steel sword in 600 bc and solid gold hilt that definitely won’t deform in his hand. 


Sword of Laban supposedly is found 2400 years later in unusually condition after being used in battle for years. Is the sword magic? I think we can’t rule it out at this point. 


Joseph please put the pipe down


So after Nephi just whips out this dude’s sword that nobody is paying attention to the Spirit is like uh you should kill this dude. 


Nephi is like uh really


Spirit says really really


Nephi chops the dude’s head off


Cold blooded murder yay!


So after Nephi has cut this dude’s head off and his blood is gushing everywhere HE PUTS ON LABAN’S CLOTHES


Joseph! The fuck were you thinking!


Nephi then decides to impersonate Laban to try to get the scriptures on plates of brass. 


Apparently Laban has a look because Laban’s servant just gives them to him


Nephi impersonates this old dude’s voice and all is fine nobody suspects a thing . 


Nephi then decides to kidnap this servant because why not.


He walks out of the city with this servant dressed as Laban. 


His brothers are like fuck Laban’s here again he killer Nephi we’re going to die


Nephi goes nah dude it’s chill I’m playing pretend so the servant tries to run away but Nephi grabs him and makes the servant Zoram come with them. Totally good guy behavior.


So let’s recap, Nephi kills a dude, takes priceless scriptures that are irreplaceable and then kidnaps a dude all in the space of one night. 


These are a the good guys

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